My grandmother's in the hospital again, for the third or fourth time in half that many years. 

I visited yesterday and brought her some soup and bread and creature comforts that make an unbearable stay a bit more bearable. I think hospitals can be a bit like prisons. Nurses and doctors can dehumanise patients in order to cope with their work, and when you have been dehumanised, you feel it. It does something to a person. 

You said, "I want.. ".

What? I asked. What do you want? 

And you said, nothing. 

And we just sat in silence. I kind of know what you want. Maybe you want to be healthy again, able to walk more than a few steps, able to do the things you used to enjoy. Maybe you want to not be 86 years old. Maybe you want a happier existence. I kind of understand. I didn't know what to say.