Thursday, July 13, 2017

When you realise you're different from your 18 year old self

I figure the difference is not that I've stopped getting upset and emotional—rather I've just learned to act on my emotions differently.

1. Just because I feel sad doesn't mean there is a good reason to feel sad.

2. It's not always about me. If someone doesn't speak to me, it's not always 'cause of me; if someone is irritated, it's not necessarily me. People have their own lives—their own dramas, tragedies, and secret desires, all of which I'm no part of. 

3. Life is short. It would be a huge waste to let myself hit rock bottom because someone decides I'm not worth his/her time. I believe I'm quirky yet still pretty awesome. Sure it hurts to be ignored. But it happens to me sometimes, I do it to others sometimes. Life isn't as great and full of happy endings as fairytales promised us.

But that's OK. We all go through it together.

4. Friendships may form so we can laugh at the world's silliness together; friendships can form so that we can share vulnerabilities and know, from the other's reaction, that we are still OK. But friendships don't have to be about bearing burdens or being 'always there' or other such idealistic blather. All friendships are different, and no one has the right to demand anything just because 'aren't we friends?'

5. All kinds of relationships can be rocky, from parent-child, husband-wife, teacher-student, employer-employee, and of course friend-friend. At the end of the day if it was based on a good foundation and expectations, rocky can become smooth.

At the risk of sounding extra-super cynical, nothing is perfect. (maybe molecules and atoms are? hmm..) There were good times and bad times; there will always be good times and bad times. That shouldn't be a cause of utter despair. Maybe just a little despair. Y'all can text me if you feel overwhelmingly sad, and then we can laugh about the terrible yet beautiful world together. (Or you can cry in your pillow, like me when I read mangas that get too devastating, or when I think about how I may never get a dog, or when I have an exam the next day).

Nitty Gritty Dirt Band - an american dream 

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