Monday, June 12, 2017

still searching

I don't think I would really believe it anyway.

What if what you want isn't what would make you happy? Perhaps it's just a case of dark human-nesss versus rational thought: animal instinct versus logic; follow your heart versus pros and cons.

I wanted to climb mount everest; I decided I liked having all my fingers and toes better. I wanted to be a writer, but chose to have a stable income instead. I once read that choosing between options isn't about which is 'better': how are we to know which really is better? We only have one life, no ctrl z, and there isn't a manual for each of our individual souls. Each option may be good in a different way.

If someone told me that what my heart's telling me is wrong—and sometimes I can't help but wish that it was wrong, wrong, wrong—I don't think I would believe them anyway. But it's also true that my heart doesn't know what it really wants most of the time. So I guess I can take it that it's got a point but it's not the unshakeable truth.

Well, welcome to year 5. In the midst of responsibility, endless gradings, learning to function in the wards, all of us have our own small battles to fight. And I talked a little about this with my dad, and he said that this isn't just about year 5. This is everyday life. There will always be challenges.

And you know, that just means it never gets boring.

IU - palette

No comments:

Post a Comment