I think that when we don't know where we are going, and when we don't know where we are standing, that lost feeling makes us...mean. It makes us upset at the world and at little things, because we've lost our direction. We're confused and surrounded, but alone. We start to lash out. We care less about others. We get ugly.
I don't think anyone really knows their end point. It's more than enough to have a general direction, as long as it resonates with our heart.
Night call starts soon and I didn't manage to nap in the student lounge. I hope I get to see interesting cases!
I think the next three days...I'll set aside some time for reflection. Not the frustrated circular thinking I'm good at, but a sort of open minded, gentle reflection? Because today (ok the last few days but today especially) I feel mean. It feels ugly.