But I don't want to call them lies, they're not lies even if they weren't true. They're little hold-backs crooked-smiling words that really were meant for something good. Even if they're words that would disadvantage you if you said them, you did.
I feel like an idiot to believe them. Although if I didn't then there was no point in you saying them, I'd just be pushing away your words and help.
I sort of want to curl up and turn back time.
Things have been popping up around the house. I confess I have no idea why or how, usually all that appears and disappears is my homework o.o
There's the cinnamon muesli bar which I thought had been munched up before Gunung Tahan, but it appeared on top of the toaster. well, yup, I just stood there and stared at it remembering a 7 day period of muesli bar lunches, but since muesli bars don't talk, and the toaster-muesli bar most probably couldn't talk either, I took it and hid it behind the cereal. I don't want to see another muesli bar in another, 7 years?
Then I found Antonio!
He's the bear my cousin gave me for my birthday, the poor dude's been sitting in the back of my bottom drawer for...gosh, I don't even know how long. I've 4 bears, Antonio, yoshino saito-san [there's a story behind this one haha but google doesn't know it], Bob [YES HAHA] and one that I have hereby renamed Mudd. (Y)
Actually Mudd was previously called Dudd (pronounced dirt) so there's not much of a difference :D He's all brown, so when I was younger and he was younger I wanted to name him something that rhymed with turd.
and well, you don't call a bear Bird unless you actually secretly wanted a stuffed chicken, so I settled on Dudd. Now it's Mudd, a tribute to those mudpools on Tahan. I shall bring Mudd and show them to my juniors next year, and tell them that where they're going there's lots of Mudds.